I’m a big believer that everyone should spend at least a portion of their life chasing their own dreams. Whether dream chasing is your life focus, or something you do a few hours a month, it has enormous value.
The act of pursuing dreams brings a sense of vitality and aliveness to your life.
It’s fun. It’s exciting. It’s invigorating.
You shift from merely existing, to truly living.
I get a lot of push back from my readers on this topic. People say…
- Chasing dreams isn’t practical.
- Dream chasing is for kids, not for adults.
- If I chase my dreams, who is going to pay the bills?
- It’s irresponsible.
The people who make these comments often perceive themselves as being wise and practical in deliberately not pursuing their dreams.
Rather than argue the point, let me frame things differently with the following statement:
If you are NOT fulfilling YOUR dreams, then you are probably fulfilling SOMEONE ELSE’S dream (without even realizing it).
If you’re at McKinsey and it’s not your dream to be there, then staying at McKinsey means fulfilling your manager’s dream of becoming a McKinsey partner off of your efforts.
If you didn’t want to become a surgeon but you became one anyway, you didn’t fulfill your own dreams. However, you may have fulfilled your parents’ dream of being parents to a surgeon.
If it isn’t your dream to get a loan to buy two cars, a big house, and have 1.7 children, but you do so anyways, you’re not fulfilling your dreams but might be fulfilling the dreams of your bank’s shareholders who profit from your decision.
My point isn’t to argue that you should or should not be fulfilling dreams.
My point is that you ALREADY are chasing dreams.
The only question that’s up for debate is WHOSE dreams are you fulfilling?
YOURS or SOMEONE ELSE’S?
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58 thoughts on “Chasing Dreams”
Ones dream is worth more than chasing. You must feed your attention and focus on it.
Victor, great article and on point. It all starts with a dream and the first step.
I retired at age 70, reluctantly a few years ago, life said I could no longer occupy the C Suite. I listened to jolting Joe DiMaggio’s statement that he wasn’t playing like he once played so he retired. Like Joe, I felt I wasn’t performing like I once did so I retired. However, unlike General MacArthur’ s comment “…old soldiers never die; they just fade away.” I dreamed of using my creative side of the brain and discovered it did exist and a potter was born: I am not bad. Now that was a surprise! Guess that art course in the 7th grade made an impression.
I am reinvigorated, my dream of mastering pottery making, in particular homebuilding keeps the blood flowing. I am almost ready for a You Tube Vedio.
So dream on!!!! and don’t wait to explore the dream, take the first step, make the journey matter. You will be surprised..
Rudolph,
What a great story. Thanks for sharing. I went into semi-retirement for a year about 10 years ago, and tried my hand at pottery too. It was not my thing, but I’m glad I tried it because now I know.
Glad you found something that excites you.
-Victor
Victor
The important thing is you tried and that is what matters.
I am making “senior bowls” for my friends, who like me, misplace keys and wallets. It is a hit! So when you go to lunch with me expect a bowl and the conversation starts and the ideas flow. The topics are endless, I never knew that folks had so many dreams, I am encouraging my friends to act on their dream.
Recently at a “coffee break” (this is what we call our meetings), with a long time friend he told me about his love of birds. This week for our “coffee break” I brought my Audubon stamp books, from my Boy Scout days in the early 1950’s, and shared. He never saw these books, he was so intrigued we moved to the library to continue the meeting. Well, it turns out the books are rare so I decided to donate them to the Audubon Society so that others can enjoy and perhaps the society can reinstitute the concept. Hoping to inspire someone to enjoy birds and the environment.
The Dream article is one of your best, thank you so much.
I’ll make it brief. BS, Marine Bio; MA, Geography; MBA, Management Analysis; Project Mgt very. Working in credit info in May 2008, and took FMLA for 2nd child. Finances = Good; net black. Satisfaction with work = Unhappy. With FMLA time off, I asked “What’s missing?” Answers: “Sustainability” (environmental) and “Marine biology” – my strong interests. Back to work in Jun 2008, and in Nov 2008, laid off in Recession. What to do?! Jan 2009: start a sustainability consulting co; back to school at Univ CA for Sustainable Business Practices and Leadership = ace coursework and projects. Pro bono consulting to small orgs. Networking. Conferences. Workshops. Friend invited me aboard dolphin survey boat at Scripps Inst Oceanography. Volunteered aboard and in lab. Research cruise on ship. Volunteering at aquarium. Got research idea, got grant, got business as ind contractor in marine research. Got job with Fish and Wildlife Dept. Satisfaction with work: wow! Love it! Finances = tough. Hopeful for higher-level job as my performance recently garnered recognition and merit increase. My clients and managers love me because I am great at what I do. Not for everyone. My dream since I was 5 years old. Life happens. How I spend time now matters. My kids and wife are proud of me. I’m happy. Bottom line for me: trade-off.
Alex,
Congratulations. Living a happy life that you love is not an easy accomplishment.
-Victor
This is really a very interesting topic that I have been mulling over, over the last maybe 5 years, much more actively in the recent past might I add.
One of my dreams was to become an engineer, and working as one, and I fulfilling this dream at the moment. Luckily for me, this was also in alignment with my parents’ dreams, so not much conflict there.
Apart from lining out a prospective career path for myself (which includes an MBA and MPA on the way), I have added another interesting take on it. With every 5-7 years of career progression I have added a “car progression”. Not to sound superficial, but I have had a fixation for cars ever since a little child (also one of the reasons I wanted to be an engineer, albeit a mechanical one, to work for a car giant. I am an electrical power engineer now, and not working with cars, but in Energy, which I really enjoy!). Hence, my career path going forward has a list of car options as well that I should own when at that position, this also helps to motivate me to do better in every job so that I can look forward to the next car.
On another angle, during my university years in the UK, I got to participate in a lot of diverse activities, which really opened and broadened my perspective (somethings I didn’t know I could physically do/overcome) – which has given me my own bucket list – so ones I wish to tick off soon are becoming a diving instructor, a sky diving instructor and learn how to ride a bike. More and more these dreams seem to be overpowering my otherwise ambitious career path.
This is an interesting point because as you said the thing about parents’ dreams and expectations from others, as I fulfill them, my self-motivation towards the non-professional dreams is becoming heavier. I, myself, am interested to see which way I lean on going forward…
Hence, I am even more motivated to take on the MBA and go back into studying, because the fact that you meet so many interesting and different people that your horizon gets furthered even more. And I want that to happen. On the other hand, if I do get into one of the “target” schools, then even if I wish to take a hiatus and actively follow the co-curricular dreams, I will always have a strong MBA to fall back upon and kick start the professional career again.
Albeit, this is an idealistic way of looking at it, real life is seldom that simple. But then maybe I would look at working for those companies or organisations that would allow me enough time to pursue the other dreams as well as in the professional growth and enable me to tick off the car list! 🙂
Hi Victor,
There is a perceived dichotomy between on the one hand pursuing your dreams, and on the other, doing something practical. Many people imagine there’s an either-or choice to be made because of the issue of time. “How will I have time to do all of this”? Well, you don’t need to pursue your dream full-time!
Sometimes spending even one hour a day doing something you truly love is enough. That hour might give you the peace of mind you need to face the daily grind.
I’ve also seen people (including myself!) struggle with determining what their dream really is. Dreams were so vivid as a kid, and then we enter adulthood, and life becomes complicated. I’m a fan of paring down your life so that you can really search for your dream, or purpose, or mission (or whatever you like to call it). It’s tough, but necessary.
Thanks for the thoughts.
David,
Yes exactly!
It doesn’t have to be an either / or proposition. Heck, even a hour a month in pursuit of a dream makes life much more interesting.
Victor
My weakness is I was dreaming at least one idea daily and my key issue is I could not focus on any one. I always want to do everything. I would greatly appreciate if you could share your insight addressing this issue through your future writings.
Vikram,
I will give this some more thought. My current hypothesis is that someone who has too many dreams may live in great fear. It is easier to have hundreds of dreams an be unable to pursue any of them, than it is to have one. Because if you only have one and you attempt it you will find out if you succeed or fail. Sometimes people don’t want to really find out.
I don’t know if this is the case for you, but I’d be curious if my hypothesis resonates with you or not.
Victor
Agreed – Thank you. “one dream at a time”. Pursuing every single dream until it succed or fail and move on. I think that is life and make onself keep happy.
All the so-called philosophy is ruled by those successful man, what ever those successful man said can always finally become so-called philosophy, it is nothing to do chasing dreams, and people will not spend a single minute on you if you are chasing your dreams but you failed, the truth is that- you become succssful, you establish the philosophy!
Dear Victor,
Though I am a lawyer and not a consultant, I have subscribed to your daily emails and I find them refreshing. In response to your message about following ones dreams, I think I have always followed the unbeaten path, but it has given me sleepless nights.
Anxiety about whether I’m behaving responsibly or whether I am wasting my time and money as other people do more “responsible” and “normal” things.
I’m hoping once I am out of my twenties and things start making more sense and there is a certain type of stability that I will be ok and less anxious. But like everything else that is worth doing in your life, following your dreams can be nerve racking. It is a risk that I don’t mind taking anyway.
Thanks for your insight.
Nyambura
Nyambura,
I can relate. Anxiety is a whole separate issue which I might write about one day. Some people are born this way, others were (inadvertently) trained this way. Rigorous physical exercise helps, as does meditation, and mindfulness.
It also helps to develop contingency plans for when things go wrong. I’ve written about this previously.
https://www.caseinterview.com/eliminate-stress
In general someone who is anxious, such as myself, is cognitively biased to over consider what can go wrong and tends to under consider what can go right.
Victor
This is very true! It’s either contribute yourself or to others.
With a full time job, I am supporting my wife with her full time study at an MBA school, and we have a new born to be taken care of. But my dreaming of going to MBB never ends. I get up at 5:30am everyday and study GMAT for 2 hours before I go to work. In addition, I participated lots of volunteer activities to strengthen my resume.
I believe with what I am doing, even if I didn’t get an offer from Ivy school, I might still find a way to get into MBB. Given time and efforts, any dream can come true. It’s a matter of protecting the dream and fight for it.
PS: Vic, I am very interested in having a conversation with you regarding my situation. Really wish I can have a chat with you.
Woody
Woody,
Keep in mind the pursuit of any dream often causes you to grow and develop as a person — to develop new skills, have new experience, and meet new people. Enjoy the process as much as the destination.
Good luck!
Victor
Awesome , you drive the point home!
Hit the nail on the head ‘