One of the wonderful things about writing for my newsletter is appreciating the incredible depth, talent and diversity of my readers.
In my last article, I wrote about the 80/20 on Happiness. When you wake up in the morning and also right before bed, think of 3 things you are grateful for. Do this for a week and you will feel 10% happier.
One of my readers, Eric, sent me the original empirical research that measured the effectiveness of this approach. Thank you, Eric!
Since I received a ton of questions about this topic, I thought I’d elaborate on a few things.
- It is better to write down your 3 “grateful things” on a piece of paper than to just think about it. I tend to favor whatever is easier, because if something is easy, it is more likely to get done.
- The 3 things you are grateful for need not be the same things every time. Simply state in that moment whatever you are grateful for, no matter how big or small.
Now I know that many of you might be thinking this happiness stuff is way too woo woo for someone analytical like me. I know this because I used to think that too.
Then I had a thought.
What is the purpose of your career and all the hard work you are doing?
Is the goal to NOT be happy?
Of course not.
If the end game is happiness, then doesn’t it make sense to see if there is a shorter, faster, and easier way to reach it?
I promised to reveal why the gratitude exercise works.
But I thought I’d do just one more exercise first. I encourage you to do it. It will take only 2 minutes:
Scroll to the Comments section below to post a comment on this page. In your comment, list as many things as you are grateful for that you can think of in 2-3 minutes.
The key is to write fast.
Do not over think. Write for speed.
Okay, here is the kicker… (don’t freak out).
Try to write fifty things you are grateful for in 2-3 minutes.
After you are done, describe how you felt — before, during, and after the exercise.
Then read everyone else’s responses.
I promise you if you make the effort to do this 2-3 minute exercise (I know it’s a pain in today’s click-happy world), you will surprise yourself.
Trust me and give it a shot.
In the comments below, write 50 things you are grateful for… and after 2-3 minutes, just stop. Don’t think. Write fast. Don’t write what you think you are supposed to be grateful for. Write for anything large or small that you are grateful for.
Go!
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427 thoughts on “The 80/20 on Happiness – Part II”
my parents
my boyfriend
my immediate family
God/ the universe
my Columbia degree
my college/ highschool friends
my life in NYC
my healthy body/ my health
my iPhone/Mac
my home
my dad’s cars
Game of Thrones
Scandal
Chai tea lattes
the Caribbean
white sand beaches
Rum
my job at Accenture
my mental well-being
my nice clothes
my Louis Vuitton bag
natural light
fall leaves/ mild weather
dogs
my guitar
my little cousin
JetBlue
Nature
Books
Obama
dried mangoes
i’m grateful for the following;
faith in God
having life
surviving Grave’s disease 9 years ago and still standing
family
a handful of friends
health
happiness
food on my table
no work yet which makes me strive harder in my job search
graduating with a first class degree
doing a PhD presently
ability to see
talk
feel
hear
taste
being computer literate
ability to acquire new skills when i get the chance eg makeup artistry, bicycling, driving, beadmaking, sewing, swimming
wonderful supervisors
ability of breathe deeply
ability to love
forgive
let go of past hurts
being single and open to meeting Mr right
keeping faith
staying strong and healthy
having some favourite pasttimes
getting thru difficulties no matter how hard.
that am alive is a miracle
am a work in progress
grateful that my country has been declared free of Ebola
God is awesome.
3 mins totally up…..
Things I am grateful for:
– I have a beautiful girlfriend
– I have all my family members alive
– I am living in an awesome city: Chicago
– I live in a very nice apartment
– I can play tennis: my favorite sport
– I am able to live in another country and experience its culture
– I am able to afford good restaurants
– I have heat in my apartment
– I am in a good physical shape
– I have a great job
– I have friends I can hang out with
– I can read awesome books
– I can watch pro tennis matches
– I can eat all the food I want
– I can speak with my family whenever I want
– I can laugh with people
Health
Family
Wonderful and understanding partner/fiance
The opportunity i have to do something special with the business i’m in
The loyal and hardworking staff i have in my team
The results i’ve managed to get so far
My nephews
My closest friends
The authentic relationships i have in my life
The people i’ve met in my life who have influenced me for the better
The ability and hunger to learn new things
The book 7 Habits of Highly effective people
Victor Cheng’s knowledge that he gives freely to people
Knowledge
Discipline
Values
Being a positive influence in people’s lives
Redoing this because I didn’t think through my previous one quickly enough…
Having faith in God
Having great shoes
Having hair
Wearing a sleek watch
Having style compared to before
Drinking tea on a cold day
Travelling and seeing the world
Getting to try Fencing
Having working bodily functions
Being relatively wealthy
Being able to walk
Having trees/access to nature
Having a phone
Getting to meet so many nice people
Having a place to sleep
Having so many luxuries
Going to school
Living in an advanced country
Having access to so much knowledge
1. Parents loving me
2. Parents are healthy
3. Living in Switzerland
4. Having friends who care about and accept me
5. me being creative
6. Me being healthy
7. Just sorted out something that matters to me
8. live next to a lake and mountains
9. learning French
10. can travel when I want
11. going to India, UAE and Iran next month!
12. often think about who I am and why I am here
13. don’t have pay for good coffee (free office supply)
14. Not often long hours at work
15. speak Chinese and English
16. Have hope
17. aware of my own fear and is working on them
18. Just got a good hair cut
19. started cooking
20. doing meditation
21. reading good books
22. meeting a fashion designer for dinner on Monday ..yeah!
22. have a good taste for style
23. like creating beautiful things
24. I am a good friend
25. Having my fav drinks- coconut water, in the fridge
26. it is not freezing outside
27. I am writing up this list
28. Seeing my friends next week in NY
29. dad got on whatsapp and WeChat
30. Meeting interesting people in my life
31. Not giving up on this list…getting so hard
32. Studied in Cambridge for a year
33. was a New Yorker
34. Sleep well these days
35. will go for a run tonight
36. My manager is great!
37. Have friends from 10 years ago
38. good appetite
39. be alive
40. going home for Christmas
41. Found about Victor Chen’s website and continue to get his emails (for free)
42. having the opportunities to go to different universities around the world for my studies
43. 6 left for this list
44. I now think that I can finish this list
45. It is fall…and it is beautiful
46. I draw and paint
47. I love colors
48. I enjoy my own company
49. The view from my balcony is amazing
50. I had a banana for snack today
I am grateful for…
Being alive
Surviving a near death experience a few years ago
Having a good meal today
Being able to experience so many things in the world (having the wealth to do so)
Having parents and a family who care about me
Getting a scholarship to go to a private school
Knowing that whatever happens the future is still positive
Being able to walk, having no diseases that limit me in any way
Having sight and hearing; the blessings of those are just immense
Having access to a lot of knowledge (libraries etc)
Having a bed to sleep on, heating, and warmth
Before the process I felt a bit nervous about thinking of so many things to come up with in 3 mins.
During the process I felt that I had a lot of things to be thankful for, and even the little things count so much.
After the process, I feel as though there’s so much in my daily life that is just positive, and it’s all about seeing life in a positive manner.
Amazing food I eat
Lot of energy
Motivation
Ambition
Physically fit
Handsome
Gf
Good teammates
Ability to buy a nice car
Small money
I read inspiration stuff and take action
Whatever I wanted I got better
I meet new people everyday
I can understand who to talk to and whom not to much.
I help others.
I have iPhone 6
I good clothes
I am good at what I do and becoming better
Less travel now
So many oPPS to contribute at work
I take initiative and am pro active
I spend less time on social networks and more time with people I love.
I took right decision
Religious
Hotel
Car
Drive
Listen to songs
Bodybuilding
Read book
People willing to help.
Past field experience.
I am hungry for more
Beautiful sun shine
Salary
Articles
Don’t watch TV
Take a nice bath
No noise
Less crowd
Easier peaceful life
1. Jesus
2. job
3. life
4. family
5. wife
6. warm home
7. car
8. four seasons
9. love
10. health
11. peanut butter
12. warm soup on a cold day
13. laughter
14. inner peace
15. friends
16. good beer
17. pizza
18. music
19. cotton underwear
20. flannel
21. sight
22. reading
23. God’s Word
24. faith
25. apples
26. venison
27. walking
28. being able to hunt
29. being able to fish
30. the countryside
31. sunsets
32. sun rises
33. rock n’ roll
34. jazz
35. sex
36. my wife’s great cooking
37. my wife’s smile
38. holding my wife’s hand
39. talking with my son
40. playing music with my boys
41. playing drums
42. breathing
43. taste buds
44. celery
45. trust
46. co-workers
47. camo
48. my backyard
49. eagles
50. Green Bay Packers
Father
Mother
Dadu
Cuddles
Good health
Warwick
Being able to eat great food
MIM
FSG
Opportunity to improve Steven’s life
Music
Drums
Beatles
Led Zeppelin
Being able to walk
Being financially comfortable
This laptop
My phone
The air conditioning
Amazing places that I could travel to
Amazing places that I did travel to
My college friends
My school friends
Liverpool
The nice shoes I just bought
The amazing books I could read
The amazing books I have already read
Stephen Covey
Deep breaths
Wind
The ability to experience so many different things
Rajma chawal
This trip to Tamil Nadu
Intellect
Jeremy Smith