One of the wonderful things about writing for my newsletter is appreciating the incredible depth, talent and diversity of my readers.
In my last article, I wrote about the 80/20 on Happiness. When you wake up in the morning and also right before bed, think of 3 things you are grateful for. Do this for a week and you will feel 10% happier.
One of my readers, Eric, sent me the original empirical research that measured the effectiveness of this approach. Thank you, Eric!
Since I received a ton of questions about this topic, I thought I’d elaborate on a few things.
- It is better to write down your 3 “grateful things” on a piece of paper than to just think about it. I tend to favor whatever is easier, because if something is easy, it is more likely to get done.
- The 3 things you are grateful for need not be the same things every time. Simply state in that moment whatever you are grateful for, no matter how big or small.
Now I know that many of you might be thinking this happiness stuff is way too woo woo for someone analytical like me. I know this because I used to think that too.
Then I had a thought.
What is the purpose of your career and all the hard work you are doing?
Is the goal to NOT be happy?
Of course not.
If the end game is happiness, then doesn’t it make sense to see if there is a shorter, faster, and easier way to reach it?
I promised to reveal why the gratitude exercise works.
But I thought I’d do just one more exercise first. I encourage you to do it. It will take only 2 minutes:
Scroll to the Comments section below to post a comment on this page. In your comment, list as many things as you are grateful for that you can think of in 2-3 minutes.
The key is to write fast.
Do not over think. Write for speed.
Okay, here is the kicker… (don’t freak out).
Try to write fifty things you are grateful for in 2-3 minutes.
After you are done, describe how you felt — before, during, and after the exercise.
Then read everyone else’s responses.
I promise you if you make the effort to do this 2-3 minute exercise (I know it’s a pain in today’s click-happy world), you will surprise yourself.
Trust me and give it a shot.
In the comments below, write 50 things you are grateful for… and after 2-3 minutes, just stop. Don’t think. Write fast. Don’t write what you think you are supposed to be grateful for. Write for anything large or small that you are grateful for.
Go!
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427 thoughts on “The 80/20 on Happiness – Part II”
I am grateful for:
family
being able to destress with friends
Having a sounding board with friends
The comfort of being able to go home to visit my parents
My condo in Old Town
Being able to enjoy what I like the most
Concerts
Exercise
Eating out and enjoying good food
Being able to do what I want on the weekends
Having a job that I enjoy most of the time
Being able to learn new things
My current manager
My sister
Visiting friends from out of town
Being able to laugh at myself
Good health, good memory, loving family, love, intelligence, a good job, living with my brother, knowing so many good people, my house, grandma is still there, good examples im my family, money to follow my dreams,
my age, energy, best gf, health, friends, business school, job, freedom, usa, family, money i’ve saved, cash flow, free time when i get it, no disabilities, my mind, my God, Jesus, hope for the future, security.
Mom
Richard
Rosalie
Julie
Neil Oliver Emma
my wife
Ernesto
gabby
health looks tennis partners work, colleagues, food, water , weed, friends, clothes, flat, Apple TV, my brain, my body, my will, my baby to be
my health
my parents
my sister
that i can work at an amazing company
drip coffee
IPA
a chance to find love
running
My health
my optimism
being intelligent
having a husband who is smart
having a husband who supportive, caring and understanding
having grit
my ballet coach preston
my ballet classmates
being able to do ballet for fun
that I can see and hear, because I really like music
that I have all my body parts
that I am not overweight
having all real teeth : )
that i can afford to take care of any emergencies that pop up
having a great surgeon when I had major surgery and that my surgery went well
to have had my mom as long as I did, even if she passed away before I was thirty and before she was 50 years old
to have gone through a difficult childhood because it made me the strong person I am today
to be able to volunteer so much with kids
that although I don’t have family, I have my husbands family. Especially since I volunteer with foster youth, you see young people who have no family support
that although I went through a lot of challenges, they were things I was able to overcome, some people deal with challenges that are/were far more difficult
having awesome mentors who help me in my professional career
being close friends with past colleagues and bosses
although not every boss has been wonderful, I had some awesome bosses
Being able to work at great organizations
having graduated from college (and from a top institution) – and not flunking out!
1. I have a much-above average good- looking face, and good body shape
2. I have a good job and my boss appreciate what I have done.
3. I have a smart brain and curious heart.
My 50 or less in 3 mins
Love, Support, Family, friends, knowledge, compassion, body, my creativity, grateful to be in this beautiful world with it’s idiosyncrasies, community, safety of myself and my loved ones, guaranteed food, water, and shelter, technology, to be born in this era of knowledge and peace, internet, a soft bed and roof above the head, kind words, generosity, a supportive team, sunshine, leisure time, supportive parents, loving relatives…
mom, dad, ben, jake, emily, olivia, nancy, my health, my beauty, my compassion, my luck, two feet, my education, my home, my support system, my job, my bosses, my opportunities, the kindness people have shown me, my 100 second chances, thu an, my hair, having food everyday,
I have a job, i am successul and mostly healthy, i have my parents my sister my friends who are just one call away from helping me, i have an artistic talent, i have a good soul, i can spend money i can be excited about something that excites me, i have many things that excite me. I know that i will achieve or do them, i can smoke, i can drink alcohol and be sad about my ex gfs, i can talk about anything and with everyone. I am smart and can learn anything quickly. I am very loved and i know it, i can stop my work stop everything and quit and just live on my small money that i earn from opening a small cookshop, i really can do that, i mean it. And thats why nobody can put high pressure on me and create the image that my life depends on them. I can speak up in any circumstance to defend myself my intelligence and integrity, that is too because of the possibility of the small cookshop and it s not just an any corporate guy’s speech, i can do it, i will do it if i have to and i would not have shame on what i do and dont regret. I have already started my life from scratch and came here, I can do it as many times I want and that only requires me being in good health. So although i am grateful that i can smoke , i probably shouldnt. And thats why i am also grateful that i live in a country and in such conditions that i can think act and feel as I like or as i said above. I am a free powerful and capable person with awesome friends family and a city to live.