One of the wonderful things about writing for my newsletter is appreciating the incredible depth, talent and diversity of my readers.
In my last article, I wrote about the 80/20 on Happiness. When you wake up in the morning and also right before bed, think of 3 things you are grateful for. Do this for a week and you will feel 10% happier.
One of my readers, Eric, sent me the original empirical research that measured the effectiveness of this approach. Thank you, Eric!
Since I received a ton of questions about this topic, I thought I’d elaborate on a few things.
- It is better to write down your 3 “grateful things” on a piece of paper than to just think about it. I tend to favor whatever is easier, because if something is easy, it is more likely to get done.
- The 3 things you are grateful for need not be the same things every time. Simply state in that moment whatever you are grateful for, no matter how big or small.
Now I know that many of you might be thinking this happiness stuff is way too woo woo for someone analytical like me. I know this because I used to think that too.
Then I had a thought.
What is the purpose of your career and all the hard work you are doing?
Is the goal to NOT be happy?
Of course not.
If the end game is happiness, then doesn’t it make sense to see if there is a shorter, faster, and easier way to reach it?
I promised to reveal why the gratitude exercise works.
But I thought I’d do just one more exercise first. I encourage you to do it. It will take only 2 minutes:
Scroll to the Comments section below to post a comment on this page. In your comment, list as many things as you are grateful for that you can think of in 2-3 minutes.
The key is to write fast.
Do not over think. Write for speed.
Okay, here is the kicker… (don’t freak out).
Try to write fifty things you are grateful for in 2-3 minutes.
After you are done, describe how you felt — before, during, and after the exercise.
Then read everyone else’s responses.
I promise you if you make the effort to do this 2-3 minute exercise (I know it’s a pain in today’s click-happy world), you will surprise yourself.
Trust me and give it a shot.
In the comments below, write 50 things you are grateful for… and after 2-3 minutes, just stop. Don’t think. Write fast. Don’t write what you think you are supposed to be grateful for. Write for anything large or small that you are grateful for.
Go!
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427 thoughts on “The 80/20 on Happiness – Part II”
Family love and support
Own family and wife (i just got married)
MBA (starting in a few months)
Career path is clearer
Going to Europe for MBA
Getting to know more people, from new places
Good health
Good friends from childhood
Good new friends
I’m thankful for:
– opportunity to attend Dartmouth
– immigrating to America from China at age 8
– friends
– living in new york
– great job
– car
– great apartment
– roommate
– health
– parents
– great food
– playing sports
– competing
– self esteem
– sense of humor
– bilingual
– traveling the world
awesome parents
Lovely sister
Beautiful girlfriend
nice job
Great living condition
Many friends
Healthy
Smart
Philosophical
Optimistic
Curious
Able to travel the world a bit
my wife
apartment
wedding ring
job
friends
leaders
thinkers
writers
love
opportunities to learn/grow
feeling healthy
laughter/humor
beauty
hope
God
singing
worship
joy
computers
Victor’s blog
long distance calls/video
music
being (barely) able to play the guitar
writing
being able to make a difference
My dad who drops me off to save commute time, internship at the company i wanted, the company of my colleagues, knowing my goals in life, coming across your website, other insightful websites which has changed my perspective.
A positive mindset, affording an education, technology, being healthy, LSE, being able to afford to go on vacation annually, being appreciated by my team, having a shelter, my parents, coffee, this sunny morning, things not working out in the past which has led to where i am today, being too blessed to be stressed (:
Thanks for this exercise Victor! For some reason this has been liberating & humbling to know how fortunate i really am.
Today my boss wasn’t here, and I chatted longer with someone colleague and got to know them a bit better. I’m graceful I’m in good terms with my parents. I will see them this weekend. I still have a lot of places to visit in this world. I’m still young. I can STILL can into consulting. I have great roommates. I have a dishwasher, I ate chips for dinner. Everyone like my brownies. I like dogs. It’s smell like fall outside. I will soon get a new job. I was productive this morning. I still a god three hours to do stud tonight.
family
friends
education
location
house
looks
fitness
workouts
physique
driving skills
ambitions
goals
analytical mind
possessions
hobbies
music
movies
my finances
ethics
moral standards
For my life
For my wife, parents, brother, and family
For my friends
For my education and giving me great learnings
For giving me strength that I can learn from my mistakes
For giving wisdom that I can find falter in myself
For wisdom that I can help others in need
For being healthy and wealthy, whatever I have
For moments with my wife, who made me learn how to smile and be in the moment
For the greatness to believe in you and charge my self everyday
Happy to have an awesome, loving family
Happy am having great sex
Have the clothes on my body now
An awesome sexy body
Have the money for flights
Have 2 sisters that teach me so much
Have had a good breakfast today
Have a maid
Have a big house
Have lots of bags I can use
For the end of the year plans to come
For this iPhone
For my looks and the attention I get
For the girl talks to come and that came
That I have a job
That I have interviews that can help with my next caterer
That I have access to home made food
That my sisters have so many friends
That I can travel
That I have a job that lets me travel
Thankful for alpha
Thankful for the amazing sex, again
Thankful for the great lunches I’ve had
Thankful for my lil bro
Thankful there’s still so much ahead of me
Thankful for the matsutake meal
And for klegg
And that karen has changed
For 40 year old Virgin
For omakase and sushi
For shopbop
That Pau cares about me a lot secretly
That I’m good at AIM office hours
For uni
That I know what I don’t want in a bf
That I can speak indo and Chinese
That my bro in law is the guy
For all comedy movies
For the Majestic hotel
1. Sonne
2. Morgens Surfen
3. Pfannkuchen
4. Meine FAmilie
5. Mein Freund
6. Meine tollen Freunde
7. Opa hat gute Laune
8. neue Bettwäsche
9. Ich bin auf Hawaii
10. Ich habe mich selbst gefunden
11. Ich bin reich
12. Ich lebe im Überfluss
13. Ich sehe gut aus
14. Ich liebe das Lernen
15. Ich habe Erfolg
16. Das Schicksal ist mir wohlgesinnt
17. Mein Freund kommt mich besuchen
18. Dass ich die kleinen Dinge wertschätzen kann
19. Meine Laser-OP
20. keine Behinderung
21. Essen. Nie Hunger haben
22. Ich brauche mir keine Sorgen machen
23. meine tolle Ausbildung
24. Mein Stipendium
25. Mein Surfbrett
26. Dass ich so viel Optimismus habe
27. meine Erziehung.
28. Dass ich an den Weltfrieden glabue
29. dass ich eine tolle berufliche Zukunft vor mir habe
30. Pandas
31. meinen Führerschein
32. dass ich resilient bin.
33. dass ich gelernt habe, nein zu sagen
34. dass es Bücher gibt
35. Cupid’s poisend arrow
36. diesen Blog
37. mein eigenes Internetprojekt
38. die Sterne
39. Sonnenaufgang
40. für mein Auslandssemester
41. für meine Großeltern
42. Für die Liebe um mich herum
43. für diesen Laptop.
44. für Google.
45. Für Menschen, die das hier alles geschaffen haben.
46. Strom
47. Erfindungen
48. Dass ich Mut habe
49. jeden Morgen aufwache und es mir gut geht
50. Ich im Luxus lebe und das erkannt habe